The Ether and Rags EP

by Responsible Johnny

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01:57
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01:49
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02:32
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released September 21, 2013

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Responsible Johnny Dallas, Texas

Imagine a unicorn that feeds you candy that tastes like rainbows. That’s how good Responsible Johnny sounds. Imagine Johnny Ramone coming back from the dead, punching Joe Queer in the face, and then making sweet, sweet love to him. Responsible Johnny is as powerful as their baby when it cries. ... more

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Track Name: Asexual
She hates cunts
And she hates cocks
But when she turns me down
It makes me hard as a rock

Because she’s asexual
Because she’s asexual

She don’t like women
And she don’t like men
I try my fuckin’ hardest
But I’m never gonna win

Because she’s asexual
Because she’s asexual

And she don’t see the point in fucking
And she don’t see the point in touching
And she don’t see the point in kissing
She don’t know just what she’s been missing

I wonder sometimes
‘Bout how little I got
I wonder if she’s ever
Had a dirty little thought

Because she’s asexual
Because she’s asexual
Track Name: Sit Down, Shut Up
Sit down, shut up
No one really gives a fuck
Sit down, shut up
No one gives a fuck about you

Your boss doesn’t even know your name
And your friends wish that they could say the same
Your parents, they don’t give a shit
Not even just a little bit
They wish that they had bought a dog instead

Sit down, shut up
No one really gives a fuck
Sit down, shut up
No one gives a fuck about you

Your girlfriend says you suck in bed
She mumbled it while she was giving head
Your neighbors talk behind your back
Tell everyone you’re selling crack
Just pack your bags, the cops are on their way

Sit down, shut up
No one really gives a fuck
Sit down, shut up
No one gives a fuck about you
Track Name: Guv'mint Man
I’m the guv’mint man
I come from guv’mint land
Here to shake your babies
And kiss all your hands

I’m the guv’mint man
And I own the room
I’m here to take your taxes
And rent out your womb

The higher you climb
The further you’ll fall
The harder you work
The quicker I’ll call
You want some
I want it all
We’ll have fun
We’ll have a ball
Track Name: Kia Rio
I’m in my little black car
And I’ll drive all night
I’m gonna get ya
I’ve got some trucker speed
I’ve got some needs
I’m gonna get ya

Comin’ after you girl
In my Kia Rio
You’ll never get away from me

I’m in my little black car
And I’ll drive all night
I’m gonna get ya
I’ve got some ether and rags
I’ve got some rope in my bags
I’m gonna get ya

Comin’ after you girl
In my Kia Rio
You’ll never get away from me
Track Name: I Dropped My Twinkie
I Dropped My Twinkie

Yellow spongecake on the floor
I'd buy another but I'm too poor
Can't see my feet but I know they’re there
I'd ask for help but no one cares

I dropped my Twinkie
I dropped my Twinkie
And I'm too fat to pick it up

Creamy filling on my shoes
Fat guys are jolly, but I've got the blues
Suck in my gut, bend down at the knees
I'm getting dizzy, I'm starting to wheeze

I dropped my Twinkie
I dropped my Twinkie
And I'm too fat to pick it up

Face down in the dirt
Ignore the pain, ignore all the hurt
Hostess goodness at my fingertips
And golden goodness on my lips

I dropped my Twinkie
I dropped my Twinkie
And I'm too fat to pick it up
Track Name: Backed Into a Corner
Backed into a corner once again
Backed into corner from so called friends
I’m not quite dead
I’m not quite alive
But at least I know I still fucking tried
But I’m backed into a corner once again

Backed into a corner ‘cause of you
Backed into a corner don’t know what to do
Not quite here
Not quite there
But at least I know I still fucking care
And I’m backed into a corner ‘cause of you